What better lesson in citizenship than using the court system?
As urban dwellers, we live in a traditional Buffalo double with lower and upper apartments. For us it has turned out to be an economical way to live in one of the best urban neighborhoods in the country. While being owner occupied mitigates many problems of being a landlord, it isn't without its moments. We had to evict our last tenant as well as have her arrested for harassment and criminal mischief due to a string of actions she took against us including an abusive letter, yelling and swearing at our kids, and dumping garbage in a hallway after the tantrum in which she yelled at the kids. It appears to me that she isn't mentally stable, but of course, I don't really know. (Yes, we did check out her background and from what we learned about her as she lived here, she would have passed even a stricter check.)
Anyway, we spent quite a bit of time during the past several weeks making trips downtown to Buffalo City Court. Many of the trips involved getting forms and filing papers for eviction over non-payment of rent. However, the kids also had to accompany us when we went to court for the actual hearing. Not only did they get the courtroom experience, but they got to see Mom and Dad win the eviction by, not only being in the right, but by being knowledgeable in the laws pertaining to the situation.
Their experience was not limited to housing court, but less than a week later, they accompanied me to one of the criminal hearings where I went as a victim/witness. Actually, since they were discussing plea bargains, I was more of a spectator, but I think they are learning.
I was impressed with their respect for the court too. While they sort of acted up and drove us crazy waiting to go into court and immediately afterwards, they were on perfect behavior in the court room each time. I take it to mean that either they really were watching what was going on or that they at least grasped the seriousness.
The final phase was helping us get ready for and look for a new tenant. While they didn't fully understand all steps, they were present for showing the apartment, taking down e-mail addresses, and finally explaining our lease and collecting the security deposit. They are getting a head start on learning how to rent out property. We learned by our own experience which was difficult.
Hopefully, we are also showing the possibilities of a diversity of income by having some business of our own and not solely relying on employment for our income. There is some freedom in running a business even though it clearly has headaches. We have our little soap business too, but that is still in its very early stages.
What do you think of all this? How have you taught citizenship or business?
Showing posts with label educational philosophy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label educational philosophy. Show all posts
Sunday, May 5, 2013
Sunday, March 31, 2013
Where Raising Independent Kids Meets Modern Mothering Guilt
A better title to this might be the "The Benefits of Parenting with a Chronic Illness" or "The Huge Risks of Parenting with a Chronic Illness" depending on your point of view. My fibromyalgia causes me to have much less energy than most people. Fortunately, pain is not my worst symptom - fatigue is - which means that I can do the things that most people do, but far less of it. I have fewer good, up hours than most people. I end up hitting the couch earlier than most people need to crash so the main consequence is that I have less time.
We often get home from activities or errands and I need to crash so the kids have to handle their own baths. It isn't uncommon that they move the last load of laundry to the dryer for me and even know which settings are for which types of loads. A few times, Carmella has peeled carrots for me when I am so tired that standing in the kitchen is difficult. They make their own peanut butter sandwiches when they get hungry. This is great unless I am about to cook dinner, of course. They know how to shut off the stove and oven as well as the timer to buy me a couple of minutes getting back to the kitchen. Later in the day they put their own dishes in the dishwasher and clean up the kitchen floor. They fold towels. Yes, they do need to be asked multiple times and this doesn't translate into cleaning up their toys sprawled out in the dining room, but they are taking charge of many tasks at a much younger age than most kids.
This does lead to some guilt. I know most kids their ages still get the coziness of Mom assisting with a bath. It feels like the house is in some disorganized chaos all the time. I am sure when I am not feeling well, I also get frustrated and snappy more easily. Ultimately, though, it seems that they are more independent.
Today, Easter Sunday, I am in loads of pain and my lower back is out, so the kids have to handle themselves whatever they choose to do (Dad is at work). When it was time to color Easter eggs, I told them to fill the pan with the eggs and water and that I would turn on the stove to boil them. They dropped and broke 4 eggs. I got upset, of course, but told them I was going back to rest and to call me after they had cleaned up, and furthermore, instead of boiling 20 they were now down to 16. Yes, I do feel a little guilty about making them do their own clean up of the egg mess and I know most parents would have let them take 4 more eggs from the fridge rather than having them accept their own losses. I am sure on Easter that if I wasn't suffering so much that the guilt would have overcome me and I would have provided more assistance, but it seems, since they succeeded, that it would be at the cost of character building.
When I came back to the kitchen I poured the hot water and vinegar, but left and let them put in their own food coloring and decorate their own eggs. The results were great:
I still don't know how the different color splotches came about so they must know some advanced technique I couldn't have taught them.
There were risks though. The water was hot, although I know they have a thorough understanding of hot in the kitchen so I am sure it is why they didn't get burned. They could have gotten dye in places that weren't helpful or broken a mug, but then I would have had them clean up. Last night they learned how to safely clean up broken glass, so they would have been ready.
I know to some people this all may seem risky, but so far, it seems that they are more independent and confident than most kids so I keep coming back to the fact that this may be the right approach even though I have sort of defaulted to it because of my fibro.
What about you? Do you let your kids handle their own messes and projects, on purpose or by accident? Do you find it builds character?
We often get home from activities or errands and I need to crash so the kids have to handle their own baths. It isn't uncommon that they move the last load of laundry to the dryer for me and even know which settings are for which types of loads. A few times, Carmella has peeled carrots for me when I am so tired that standing in the kitchen is difficult. They make their own peanut butter sandwiches when they get hungry. This is great unless I am about to cook dinner, of course. They know how to shut off the stove and oven as well as the timer to buy me a couple of minutes getting back to the kitchen. Later in the day they put their own dishes in the dishwasher and clean up the kitchen floor. They fold towels. Yes, they do need to be asked multiple times and this doesn't translate into cleaning up their toys sprawled out in the dining room, but they are taking charge of many tasks at a much younger age than most kids.
This does lead to some guilt. I know most kids their ages still get the coziness of Mom assisting with a bath. It feels like the house is in some disorganized chaos all the time. I am sure when I am not feeling well, I also get frustrated and snappy more easily. Ultimately, though, it seems that they are more independent.
Today, Easter Sunday, I am in loads of pain and my lower back is out, so the kids have to handle themselves whatever they choose to do (Dad is at work). When it was time to color Easter eggs, I told them to fill the pan with the eggs and water and that I would turn on the stove to boil them. They dropped and broke 4 eggs. I got upset, of course, but told them I was going back to rest and to call me after they had cleaned up, and furthermore, instead of boiling 20 they were now down to 16. Yes, I do feel a little guilty about making them do their own clean up of the egg mess and I know most parents would have let them take 4 more eggs from the fridge rather than having them accept their own losses. I am sure on Easter that if I wasn't suffering so much that the guilt would have overcome me and I would have provided more assistance, but it seems, since they succeeded, that it would be at the cost of character building.
When I came back to the kitchen I poured the hot water and vinegar, but left and let them put in their own food coloring and decorate their own eggs. The results were great:
There were risks though. The water was hot, although I know they have a thorough understanding of hot in the kitchen so I am sure it is why they didn't get burned. They could have gotten dye in places that weren't helpful or broken a mug, but then I would have had them clean up. Last night they learned how to safely clean up broken glass, so they would have been ready.
I know to some people this all may seem risky, but so far, it seems that they are more independent and confident than most kids so I keep coming back to the fact that this may be the right approach even though I have sort of defaulted to it because of my fibro.
What about you? Do you let your kids handle their own messes and projects, on purpose or by accident? Do you find it builds character?
Saturday, March 23, 2013
Making Our Own Soap
I often contemplate whether or not our homeschooling approach is good. We do a mix of online curriculum, reading classic books, and hands-on activities, not to mention the outside classes they have in art, science, martial arts and dancing. I recently tried to decide which hands-on activities are most valuable. It struck me that we should try to make as many of the things we use as possible - if not on an ongoing basis, at least once or twice to get a sense of what's involved.
Soap is something that I hadn't though about too much except I was pretty sure that what we were buying in the store wasn't all that healthy. Once I researched it, however, I found out that so many academic subjects could be covered in making soap so there is value across age groups. There's safety, chemistry, math, social studies, art, reading, and research skills.
Safety is very important since you are handling lye. Glasses and gloves must be used. I suit up the kids in sunglasses that wrap around with good coverage and gloves. I also don't have them directly handle the lye.
Chemistry is obviously covered, but the real nuts and bolts of the reactions are probably better for older age groups though. Still, my kids get a sense of it by measuring the temperature of lye and water mixture (with a non-touching thermometer) and seeing how much heat is given of when the two combine.
Math is well covered. I have them add up the oil amounts so we know what number we are weighing to on the scale. They weigh the oils and take temperatures. They help me use an online calculator to determine how much lye and water is needed for the type of oil. There is also cutting the soap trying to get as even measurements as possible and weighing the bars once they are cut.
Social studies is loosely covered since I have explained that mixing oils and lye is the traditional way of making soap back into history. There is also the economics of selling some of the soap online and to friends and acquaintances.
Art is somewhat involved because one can get creative with coloring and design. Although we prefer natural soaps we stay away from too much in the way of color. However, it is interesting to see how appearance is affected by the ingredients. We may experiment with color at some point providing it is from natural sources.
Reading is obvious since we need to read recipes. Although many recipes we learn by watching videos.
This brings me to one of the best thing - research skills. We learned a great deal from youtube and doing internet searches so the kids got a sense of how to take charge and learn something independently without only relying on formal education. It also strikes me that youtube, on some respects, is like John Holt's vision for education where there are no schools, but people finding each other and teaching what they know. This happens when an expert puts up a good video and people like us find them and can replicate what they are doing with no classroom required. The information is free and available.
On a related note, we did make our own dry laundry detergent. I am not sure what we will do next in the way of things we use. What items have you made as a homeschool project that you were able to use?
Soap is something that I hadn't though about too much except I was pretty sure that what we were buying in the store wasn't all that healthy. Once I researched it, however, I found out that so many academic subjects could be covered in making soap so there is value across age groups. There's safety, chemistry, math, social studies, art, reading, and research skills.
Safety is very important since you are handling lye. Glasses and gloves must be used. I suit up the kids in sunglasses that wrap around with good coverage and gloves. I also don't have them directly handle the lye.
Chemistry is obviously covered, but the real nuts and bolts of the reactions are probably better for older age groups though. Still, my kids get a sense of it by measuring the temperature of lye and water mixture (with a non-touching thermometer) and seeing how much heat is given of when the two combine.
Math is well covered. I have them add up the oil amounts so we know what number we are weighing to on the scale. They weigh the oils and take temperatures. They help me use an online calculator to determine how much lye and water is needed for the type of oil. There is also cutting the soap trying to get as even measurements as possible and weighing the bars once they are cut.
Social studies is loosely covered since I have explained that mixing oils and lye is the traditional way of making soap back into history. There is also the economics of selling some of the soap online and to friends and acquaintances.
Art is somewhat involved because one can get creative with coloring and design. Although we prefer natural soaps we stay away from too much in the way of color. However, it is interesting to see how appearance is affected by the ingredients. We may experiment with color at some point providing it is from natural sources.
Reading is obvious since we need to read recipes. Although many recipes we learn by watching videos.
This brings me to one of the best thing - research skills. We learned a great deal from youtube and doing internet searches so the kids got a sense of how to take charge and learn something independently without only relying on formal education. It also strikes me that youtube, on some respects, is like John Holt's vision for education where there are no schools, but people finding each other and teaching what they know. This happens when an expert puts up a good video and people like us find them and can replicate what they are doing with no classroom required. The information is free and available.
On a related note, we did make our own dry laundry detergent. I am not sure what we will do next in the way of things we use. What items have you made as a homeschool project that you were able to use?
Saturday, March 9, 2013
Walking Home with No Underwear
I have probably grabbed your attention with the title. Hopefully, you will find the post interesting too. Today, I took the kids swimming. This is something I do pretty often to keep their skills up. It is an undertaking in some ways because we need to pack up and walk the mile there. Luckily our bags are on wheels. I don't always have a lot of energy which translates into less time when I do have energy, so I frequently have the kids pack their own bags. It is hard to get Carmella going sometimes, but once she starts packing she remembers everything. So at least it is smooth once we get there. Thomas, on the other hand, often forgets whole outfits having to walking home in the same outfit he wore there despite it being dirty and having had a full shower. I am big on re-wearing outfits a time or two before washing, but after a bath or shower, I think something that is completely clean is most appropriate. I often wear the same thing (for all leave-the-house occasions) for a full 48 hours between showers, but then I want a fresh outfit. Anyway, today, despite being reminded by Carmella and me, Thomas forgot his underwear. So I had to decide whether to let him wear dirty underwear after a shower or to walk home with no underwear on. I chose the latter for the above mentioned reasons.
Then, I started thinking to myself that it is a good thing that he doesn't go to school. He would suffer in terms of lower grades for forgetting homework or forgetting to have it signed or getting in trouble for not having forms signed. Of course, it can't just be my son. I am sure there are loads of kids like him. There must be lots of kids getting into trouble in school for being forgetful. This isn't exactly what is happening though. To my knowledge, parents are very involved in kids' homework and teachers purposely involve them. The parents open the backpacks. Perhaps this is the problem. Kids often don't become accountable or independent because the consequences are so serious (in terms of grades) that they are not left to handle their responsibility independently. I think it is good for my son that he had to walk home with no underwear. Next time, he will be more likely to remember and it has no permanent consequences (like a school transcript), only the short term weird feeling of walking home in pants with no underwear under them.
The funny thing is that when he goes to one of his activities, I let him go in the boy's locker room alone and he changes outfits just fine and doesn't forget anything. He is even fast at it versus my begging him to get dressed at home. At that same activity, there is a boy close to his age, probably in between his and Carmella's ages, who changes in the girls locker room with his mother. Aside from this bugging me a little bit since Carmella has to change with him, it is clearly not going to help him be independent. I am not sure her reason for doing it. If it is out of fear, it doesn't make sense since these are small locker rooms with the instructors (appropriate gender) moving in and out of them frequently. I would understand fear in a big public place like a mall or grocery store with many strangers. In those settings, Thomas still comes in the ladies room with us (provided Dad isn't out with us). It must be because she feels like she needs to help him change or pack. In my experience though, my kids handle things in a grown up manner when I give them space. When I micromanage, they go out of their way to be forgetful and even goofy and out of hand.
Perhaps this is the problem with the education system today. In the 1980s we were a bit older when we went to school. I don't remember my parents ever opening my backpack. Sometimes, they asked if I had homework and sometimes they didn't. I learned to keep track of myself so I wouldn't get a bad grade or lose recess. Now kids get a mixed message. They are expected to work full-time at school as if they are adults, but they are not given the responsibility and corresponding feeling of independence. It's not that I think parents should never help with a difficult homework, but being involved in it daily, especially at the expectation of the teachers, is counterproductive. While I am not always successful, I try to teach my kids in a manner opposite to this. I want them to have real responsibility (packing without me checking their bags), but don't want to turn it into a full-time job.
Anyway, this is what I was thinking about while my son walked home with no underwear on. Only time will tell if my methods are better, but something to ponder.
Then, I started thinking to myself that it is a good thing that he doesn't go to school. He would suffer in terms of lower grades for forgetting homework or forgetting to have it signed or getting in trouble for not having forms signed. Of course, it can't just be my son. I am sure there are loads of kids like him. There must be lots of kids getting into trouble in school for being forgetful. This isn't exactly what is happening though. To my knowledge, parents are very involved in kids' homework and teachers purposely involve them. The parents open the backpacks. Perhaps this is the problem. Kids often don't become accountable or independent because the consequences are so serious (in terms of grades) that they are not left to handle their responsibility independently. I think it is good for my son that he had to walk home with no underwear. Next time, he will be more likely to remember and it has no permanent consequences (like a school transcript), only the short term weird feeling of walking home in pants with no underwear under them.
The funny thing is that when he goes to one of his activities, I let him go in the boy's locker room alone and he changes outfits just fine and doesn't forget anything. He is even fast at it versus my begging him to get dressed at home. At that same activity, there is a boy close to his age, probably in between his and Carmella's ages, who changes in the girls locker room with his mother. Aside from this bugging me a little bit since Carmella has to change with him, it is clearly not going to help him be independent. I am not sure her reason for doing it. If it is out of fear, it doesn't make sense since these are small locker rooms with the instructors (appropriate gender) moving in and out of them frequently. I would understand fear in a big public place like a mall or grocery store with many strangers. In those settings, Thomas still comes in the ladies room with us (provided Dad isn't out with us). It must be because she feels like she needs to help him change or pack. In my experience though, my kids handle things in a grown up manner when I give them space. When I micromanage, they go out of their way to be forgetful and even goofy and out of hand.
Perhaps this is the problem with the education system today. In the 1980s we were a bit older when we went to school. I don't remember my parents ever opening my backpack. Sometimes, they asked if I had homework and sometimes they didn't. I learned to keep track of myself so I wouldn't get a bad grade or lose recess. Now kids get a mixed message. They are expected to work full-time at school as if they are adults, but they are not given the responsibility and corresponding feeling of independence. It's not that I think parents should never help with a difficult homework, but being involved in it daily, especially at the expectation of the teachers, is counterproductive. While I am not always successful, I try to teach my kids in a manner opposite to this. I want them to have real responsibility (packing without me checking their bags), but don't want to turn it into a full-time job.
Anyway, this is what I was thinking about while my son walked home with no underwear on. Only time will tell if my methods are better, but something to ponder.
Monday, January 21, 2013
Teaching Time Managment
As part of our homeschooling, I have a list of classic children's books sorted in precise grade level order (2.1, 2.2, etc.) that I am having the kids read in addition to their Time4Learning, outside activities, and impromptu play and experiments. Sometimes, it is hard to get T to sit down and read because there are so many things he wants to do. I began to push bringing his books with us to activities. Since we ride the NFTA buses to go places there is usually extra time waiting for a bus and extra time when we get somewhere early because the bus times aren't always precise for the desired arrival time. There is also the time waiting for a bus to come home.
He fought me at first, but when he realized that he was getting almost all his reading done during time that would otherwise be wasted, he got much better about it. He now sees that he has more time at home to play and do other things. Hopefully, he will begin to appreciate how important time management is. I think this is a pretty good way to teach it especially because without going to school there is still a tremendous amount of free time and this just increases it. When I was in school learning time management wasn't the difference between free time and more free time, but no free time and a little free time. It was hard to see the point when I was so overloaded. Only time will tell if the time management sticks, but we'll wait and see. I certainly think learning it in the context of more choices is better than the way I learned it where there was more of a punishment element in not having all my assignments ready. Again, we'll have to see how it works long term.
He fought me at first, but when he realized that he was getting almost all his reading done during time that would otherwise be wasted, he got much better about it. He now sees that he has more time at home to play and do other things. Hopefully, he will begin to appreciate how important time management is. I think this is a pretty good way to teach it especially because without going to school there is still a tremendous amount of free time and this just increases it. When I was in school learning time management wasn't the difference between free time and more free time, but no free time and a little free time. It was hard to see the point when I was so overloaded. Only time will tell if the time management sticks, but we'll wait and see. I certainly think learning it in the context of more choices is better than the way I learned it where there was more of a punishment element in not having all my assignments ready. Again, we'll have to see how it works long term.
Monday, January 7, 2013
Kid (and Winter) Prompted Science Experiments
Walking down the sidewalks in Buffalo, I can't help but complain about the way people don't shovel. I know my neighbors hate how I am last minute with my lawn in the summer, but when it comes to shoveling, I am out there quick and regularly scraping down to the concrete. I don't believe in salt because of the environment. If you scrape it right away and wait for the sun to come out (even the limited Buffalo winter sun), it is all you need. When my kids encountered sidewalks that were poorly shoveled but covered with salt, I want off about this. Surprise, Surprise! Anyway, after I shut up, they asked me why salt is put on ice.
It then turned into a great basic science experiment. We put two plastic yogurt cups of water in the freezer to freeze. Then we took them out and put lots of salt, a big layer, on one of them. I tried to explain that the one without salt was the control one and the other was the experimental one, but I am not sure they will remember.
We then placed them back in the freezer. Over the next several days, we observed the one with the salt melt despite being in the freezer.
Of course, they had to taste the salt water to see that it wasn't plain water. That part was their idea, not mine, but since it was plain old salt, it didn't hurt them.
The best part of the whole thing is that some of our regular activities prompted this which made it relevant. Over the holidays, I know I was starting to worry about not being creative enough with coming up with experiments. After this, I started to worry less.
I highly recommend this experiment, mainly because it is very easy and not too much work, but also because it is so relevant this time of year.
It then turned into a great basic science experiment. We put two plastic yogurt cups of water in the freezer to freeze. Then we took them out and put lots of salt, a big layer, on one of them. I tried to explain that the one without salt was the control one and the other was the experimental one, but I am not sure they will remember.
We then placed them back in the freezer. Over the next several days, we observed the one with the salt melt despite being in the freezer.
Of course, they had to taste the salt water to see that it wasn't plain water. That part was their idea, not mine, but since it was plain old salt, it didn't hurt them.
The best part of the whole thing is that some of our regular activities prompted this which made it relevant. Over the holidays, I know I was starting to worry about not being creative enough with coming up with experiments. After this, I started to worry less.
I highly recommend this experiment, mainly because it is very easy and not too much work, but also because it is so relevant this time of year.
Monday, December 3, 2012
The Educational Headlines Get Scarier
Earlier this week, I was in bed flipping through the few channels we get with our antenna. When I got to Channel 2, one of the major stories was NY To Add 300 Hours To Public School Year . The story was about how five states, including New York, are planning to increase the amount of hours that students spend in school. It is extremely disturbing to me since one of the reasons that I homeschool T & C is that I think that school is already too much of a full-time job for kids. Not only does it rob them of their childhood to benefit adults' work schedules (whose real benefit is the corporations that sell them the vast number of unnecessary items they buy on two incomes or low wages when families can't help but need two incomes for the basics), but nobody is asking the hard questions about the use of time in the schools or what is really necessary for children to learn.
The first question that should be asked is whether or not the time used in school is efficient or effective. When T used to go to a local school for speech, there were several times, when the speech teacher called to tell me not to bring him since they were engrossed in a testing week. If 10-20% of the time (from what I can tell) is spent on testing, then valuable class time for learning is being wasted, never mind the time for assemblies, discipline, lining up, etc. Some things are unavoidable in a school environment because of its model. Inherently, some time will be spent on making sure everyone is there and waiting for people to calm down. It is just the drawback of 20-30 kids per one teacher.
What I want to know is how is my son, who hasn't turned six yet, reading at a nearly second grade level while only spending about 2 hours a day, 4 days a week on traditional academics? How is this possible when he is not a genius and my health means that he learns independently in most cases? How is it possible when he spends so much more time out in the world and doing random hands-on activities and free play? I am not sure I can directly answer how its happening except that it is a clear testament to the fact that kids don't need to be couped up six plus hours a day away from their homes.
What about what they learn? What skills are really necessary for adulthood? Are kids really going to remember everything? Is there some way to arm them with the skills for life-long learning instead so they can confidently pick up whatever skills they need when they need them? It is time to look at the vast amount of knowledge available, the limited capacity of the human brain to master it, and come up with a better way to decide what should be learned. Does hard core academics for so many hours make sense when there are many more things that adults need to know including things like homemaking which everyone needs to do in some way or minor repair for the large number of people who will own a home? This is just to name a few. After all, real learning happens when one chooses to learn and it is relevant.
I am worried for the other kids, honestly, really worried. They are experiencing child labor masquerading as school and extracurricular activities. My general observation of conventional school students close to my kids' ages is that they work almost all-day five days a week and sometimes several hours on Saturday. They are at school about six and a half hours a day with little recess and a twenty-minute lunch break (short even by adult labor standards). The transportation and waiting for buses adds half an hour to an hour to this. Then there is afterschool program or extracurricular activities (almost always multiple ones a week) with kids often getting home after five or even six. Then there is the socially acceptable (and necessary with this schedule) strict 8 pm bed time allowing a short dinner, bath, and homework. The only difference between the problematic child labor of past years is that children now receive little economic benefit and eventually go into debt for college where the overworked kids of past may have received some compensation even if far too low. They were also physically active while the kids today are acquiring numerous health conditions due to inactivity. Yes, in the case of the extracurricular activities, there is some fitness in many of them, and certainly those are less "work" in the sense that presumably the kids chose them (even though parental pressure is pretty high these days so maybe not) rather than being forced into them like school. I am not trying to romanticize the harsh lives of children in the past, but I think it is helpful to see the parallels including that it is still all for adult benefit. In the past the adults whom benefited were the owners of family farms in the most benevolent cases and greedy factory owners in the worst cases. Today, the educational establishment, even though perhaps better intentioned, benefits tremendously. Parents today, no longer owning farms, benefit by having free child care to chase the rewards society glorifies most, money and status.
It will be interesting to see what the public has to say about the increased hours. My guess is that most adults will be happy. Parents will be relieved to have their kids time occupied while they work or run errands. It is already pretty clear that parents today are comfortable turning their kids over to professionals to raise them rather than doing it themselves. The educational establishment will respond by chasing more compensation for more hours, and designing new specializations for professionals who work in the schools. The kids won't know if they are young and the older ones won't find a good mechanism for the outrage they may feel. I know that I am outraged, but other than writing these sorts of articles, there isn't much of a way to change minds. I am sure that if I tried to convince kids that they were working too hard, their parents, who already feel threatened by my unconventional choices, would not be pleased with me. It is bad enough that the decision to homeschool is inherently an indictment of the decision by others to conventionally school even if I don't mean to specifically question the choices of others. I know that many others, including other bloggers, like to dress their decision up in a sort of diplomatic everyone choosing what is best for their own family type of view, but when you choose something so out of the mainstream (homeschooling is known and growing, but still relatively low numbers) it really does say something about the status quo given that it is socially much easier to do what everyone else does.
What do you think about this news? It won't be news for long because people will be happy or will more people choose to homeschool because of it?
The first question that should be asked is whether or not the time used in school is efficient or effective. When T used to go to a local school for speech, there were several times, when the speech teacher called to tell me not to bring him since they were engrossed in a testing week. If 10-20% of the time (from what I can tell) is spent on testing, then valuable class time for learning is being wasted, never mind the time for assemblies, discipline, lining up, etc. Some things are unavoidable in a school environment because of its model. Inherently, some time will be spent on making sure everyone is there and waiting for people to calm down. It is just the drawback of 20-30 kids per one teacher.
What I want to know is how is my son, who hasn't turned six yet, reading at a nearly second grade level while only spending about 2 hours a day, 4 days a week on traditional academics? How is this possible when he is not a genius and my health means that he learns independently in most cases? How is it possible when he spends so much more time out in the world and doing random hands-on activities and free play? I am not sure I can directly answer how its happening except that it is a clear testament to the fact that kids don't need to be couped up six plus hours a day away from their homes.
What about what they learn? What skills are really necessary for adulthood? Are kids really going to remember everything? Is there some way to arm them with the skills for life-long learning instead so they can confidently pick up whatever skills they need when they need them? It is time to look at the vast amount of knowledge available, the limited capacity of the human brain to master it, and come up with a better way to decide what should be learned. Does hard core academics for so many hours make sense when there are many more things that adults need to know including things like homemaking which everyone needs to do in some way or minor repair for the large number of people who will own a home? This is just to name a few. After all, real learning happens when one chooses to learn and it is relevant.
I am worried for the other kids, honestly, really worried. They are experiencing child labor masquerading as school and extracurricular activities. My general observation of conventional school students close to my kids' ages is that they work almost all-day five days a week and sometimes several hours on Saturday. They are at school about six and a half hours a day with little recess and a twenty-minute lunch break (short even by adult labor standards). The transportation and waiting for buses adds half an hour to an hour to this. Then there is afterschool program or extracurricular activities (almost always multiple ones a week) with kids often getting home after five or even six. Then there is the socially acceptable (and necessary with this schedule) strict 8 pm bed time allowing a short dinner, bath, and homework. The only difference between the problematic child labor of past years is that children now receive little economic benefit and eventually go into debt for college where the overworked kids of past may have received some compensation even if far too low. They were also physically active while the kids today are acquiring numerous health conditions due to inactivity. Yes, in the case of the extracurricular activities, there is some fitness in many of them, and certainly those are less "work" in the sense that presumably the kids chose them (even though parental pressure is pretty high these days so maybe not) rather than being forced into them like school. I am not trying to romanticize the harsh lives of children in the past, but I think it is helpful to see the parallels including that it is still all for adult benefit. In the past the adults whom benefited were the owners of family farms in the most benevolent cases and greedy factory owners in the worst cases. Today, the educational establishment, even though perhaps better intentioned, benefits tremendously. Parents today, no longer owning farms, benefit by having free child care to chase the rewards society glorifies most, money and status.
It will be interesting to see what the public has to say about the increased hours. My guess is that most adults will be happy. Parents will be relieved to have their kids time occupied while they work or run errands. It is already pretty clear that parents today are comfortable turning their kids over to professionals to raise them rather than doing it themselves. The educational establishment will respond by chasing more compensation for more hours, and designing new specializations for professionals who work in the schools. The kids won't know if they are young and the older ones won't find a good mechanism for the outrage they may feel. I know that I am outraged, but other than writing these sorts of articles, there isn't much of a way to change minds. I am sure that if I tried to convince kids that they were working too hard, their parents, who already feel threatened by my unconventional choices, would not be pleased with me. It is bad enough that the decision to homeschool is inherently an indictment of the decision by others to conventionally school even if I don't mean to specifically question the choices of others. I know that many others, including other bloggers, like to dress their decision up in a sort of diplomatic everyone choosing what is best for their own family type of view, but when you choose something so out of the mainstream (homeschooling is known and growing, but still relatively low numbers) it really does say something about the status quo given that it is socially much easier to do what everyone else does.
What do you think about this news? It won't be news for long because people will be happy or will more people choose to homeschool because of it?
Friday, November 16, 2012
Happiness as an Educational Goal
A couple of months ago, I took out Happiness and Education by Nel Noddings
from the Buffalo and Erie County Public Library. I have been meaning to write about it for a while now, but with the difficulty concentrating that I have due to fibro fog, reading takes me a very long time. Anyway, I really enjoyed the book and its arguments. I liked the discussion of happiness as a reasonable goal for education. There really is quite a bit of support for it when looked at through the eyes of philosophy.
One of the best parts, however, was that it really illuminated how lopsided the conventional education system is towards hard academics and career preparation. While intuitively, it seems unnecessarily to coop kids up on a nearly full-time basis for academics, I am not sure I thought about how many things that conventional school doesn't cover or cover enough that take up a significant part of life such as home making and interpersonal relationships. I suppose that most people expect students to learn those things at home, but, of course, with all the time spent in school and on homework, they are not covered well at home either.
The book also touches on the inherent materialism that is the goal in education since everyone expects that if they work hard at school they'll get a good job and be able to buy everything they need. Education is often cited as a way to promote equality and diminish poverty. However, someone will always have to do the work that society values with low wages so it illuminates that poverty is a social problem and not an educational one.
These are just some of the things that I gleaned from reading this book. I recommend it to everyone with kids, but especially homeschool parents. While I haven't made dramatic changes to our routine because of it, it has helped me put our activities into good perspective.
from the Buffalo and Erie County Public Library. I have been meaning to write about it for a while now, but with the difficulty concentrating that I have due to fibro fog, reading takes me a very long time. Anyway, I really enjoyed the book and its arguments. I liked the discussion of happiness as a reasonable goal for education. There really is quite a bit of support for it when looked at through the eyes of philosophy.One of the best parts, however, was that it really illuminated how lopsided the conventional education system is towards hard academics and career preparation. While intuitively, it seems unnecessarily to coop kids up on a nearly full-time basis for academics, I am not sure I thought about how many things that conventional school doesn't cover or cover enough that take up a significant part of life such as home making and interpersonal relationships. I suppose that most people expect students to learn those things at home, but, of course, with all the time spent in school and on homework, they are not covered well at home either.
The book also touches on the inherent materialism that is the goal in education since everyone expects that if they work hard at school they'll get a good job and be able to buy everything they need. Education is often cited as a way to promote equality and diminish poverty. However, someone will always have to do the work that society values with low wages so it illuminates that poverty is a social problem and not an educational one.
These are just some of the things that I gleaned from reading this book. I recommend it to everyone with kids, but especially homeschool parents. While I haven't made dramatic changes to our routine because of it, it has helped me put our activities into good perspective.
Friday, November 2, 2012
Worm Farming Adventures
We have had a worm farm in our kitchen since before June 1st. It has been a great learning experience for T and C. My main reason for getting it is that I couldn't stand the idea that we put food scraps in the garbage. Having the scraps be preserved, sort of, in plastic bags in a landfill bothered me. Since we are in the city and close to large apartment buildings and businesses with dumpsters, a regular outdoor compost pile seemed out of the question since it could attract rats. Most people compost to have a garden. Hopefully, we will transform our front yard slowly starting next spring, but we are far from being gardening people. It wasn't our main reason for getting one anyway, it was the landfill thing.
I waited until now to do a big post on it even though I have mentioned it on my other blog with our homeschool days itemized. Now seems like an appropriate time since we recently rotated the last tray and found our mostly finished compost.
I say mostly finished because some of the paper wasn't eaten either because we didn't make the pieces small enough or because we had so much in the first tray as bedding. However, the food was completely gone and we found no worms or cocoons as they had all hatched and migrated to the upper trays for new food. We decided to put the paper back through one more time. It was a great experience for the kids to see that the food was gone. Here is a picture from June from that tray:
The journey was especially fun too. We got to see the worms mate and we found cocoons. Now that the population is much bigger, likely doubled, we catch them mating about half of all times we open the bin now.
In this picture, there is both interlocked clittela between the worms and if you look closely, a nice cocoon near them. Worms, in this case red wigglers, spend their days eating, crawling, and mating. They mate weekly, when mature, and don't need to sleep. They are hermaphrodites, but can't fertilize themselves. Knowing their activities and optimum conditions is important for trouble shooting problems. One example of a problem was escaping worms, not loads but too many. In that case, we had stirred in food too soon that was still too hot and they had no cool place to find refuge. We discussed chemistry a bit observing heat from the composting food. It is important to note that microorganisms take care of the food and the worms eat them.
Observation of worms in a habitat isn't the only positive. It is also a good experience for the kids to take care of the farm draining the farm and adding food and paper.
It was a great all around project for biology, chemistry, environmentalism, responsibility, and sustainability, never mind the complete circle when we use the compost in our front yard. The only part we bi-passed was making the farm. I hit a sale on a tray set up and bought it when I had the chance to do it, but a more complete way to do this is to build your own using some of the videos on you tube as instructions. In my case, I was concerned about my energy level and didn't want that to hold us back from the rest of the project.
If you have a worm farm, are you enjoying it?
I waited until now to do a big post on it even though I have mentioned it on my other blog with our homeschool days itemized. Now seems like an appropriate time since we recently rotated the last tray and found our mostly finished compost.
I say mostly finished because some of the paper wasn't eaten either because we didn't make the pieces small enough or because we had so much in the first tray as bedding. However, the food was completely gone and we found no worms or cocoons as they had all hatched and migrated to the upper trays for new food. We decided to put the paper back through one more time. It was a great experience for the kids to see that the food was gone. Here is a picture from June from that tray:
The journey was especially fun too. We got to see the worms mate and we found cocoons. Now that the population is much bigger, likely doubled, we catch them mating about half of all times we open the bin now.
In this picture, there is both interlocked clittela between the worms and if you look closely, a nice cocoon near them. Worms, in this case red wigglers, spend their days eating, crawling, and mating. They mate weekly, when mature, and don't need to sleep. They are hermaphrodites, but can't fertilize themselves. Knowing their activities and optimum conditions is important for trouble shooting problems. One example of a problem was escaping worms, not loads but too many. In that case, we had stirred in food too soon that was still too hot and they had no cool place to find refuge. We discussed chemistry a bit observing heat from the composting food. It is important to note that microorganisms take care of the food and the worms eat them.
Observation of worms in a habitat isn't the only positive. It is also a good experience for the kids to take care of the farm draining the farm and adding food and paper.
It was a great all around project for biology, chemistry, environmentalism, responsibility, and sustainability, never mind the complete circle when we use the compost in our front yard. The only part we bi-passed was making the farm. I hit a sale on a tray set up and bought it when I had the chance to do it, but a more complete way to do this is to build your own using some of the videos on you tube as instructions. In my case, I was concerned about my energy level and didn't want that to hold us back from the rest of the project.
If you have a worm farm, are you enjoying it?
Friday, October 19, 2012
City Living and Physical Education
This morning was a great morning. First of all, I felt pretty good, not as good as yesterday but a far cry from the several bad fibro days I had earlier in the week. Second of all, we did several errands this morning to buy supplies for a project we were working on. One of them involved taking the bus to a big regular grocery store, something we don't do all that frequently.
During our journey there, I couldn't help but think about the superior physical education that my kids are receiving. Getting to the store involved quite a bit of walking. First, we grabbed the bus down two blocks so we could hit the better mail box. (For some reason, the one at our block has one pick up while the one two blocks down has several pick ups at good times.) Then when we got off the bus we had to walk about five times as far as someone who would drive to the store and park in the lot. We also brought our grocery cart which had to be pushed, not just to and from a car, but to and from the bus. On the way home, knowing that getting the bus there has been unlucky for me without waiting a long time, we decided to walk and turn around each stop to see if it was coming (since the stops are pretty close together). By the time we saw it, we were less than a mile from home so we just kept walking for a total of about 2 miles. It was beautiful outside and and invigorating for the soul to be out in the sunshine with all the activity around.
A habit of regular exercise woven into life is what I prescribe as physical education. This will benefit them far into adulthood. It doesn't seem strange to them to walk distances to go places or to think about how to get things from one place to another without a car. Unfortunately, physical education traditionally focuses on sports, specifically team sports. I am all for sports that can be used regularly into adult life like running or swimming, but how many adults are on teams of the sports they used to play in school? Relatively few. Further, I have a serious problem with the message of team sports with the emphasis on competition. Even when competition is downplayed, there is always a winner and a loser. Many think competition is fundamental to our society particularly with the vast materialism in the name of the free market. However, I don't believe it has to be. It isn't inherent in our human nature. Real and widespread collaboration would be a better way. Of course, team sports reinforce competition in an enticing manner along side the conventional education and employment system. It isn't enough to talk about collaboration while continuing to subscribe to the institutions whose fundamental nature is competition. Our society would need to function quite a bit differently including rejecting conventional education with its testing, ranking, and sorting. It would have to be a revolution of sorts since competition is so woven into society. Almost every news broadcast where politics is discussed has it and walk into any business with a tv on and the vast majority have sports on for their customers (including the cafe at the grocery store this morning).
If T or C asked to join a sport would I let them? Of course. After all, we are trying to do our best at child centered learning. Will they ask? Probably not. We have limited the exposure to sports on tv and discussion of team or professional sports as much as we can. We wouldn't stop them from watching, but we never set an example of watching them ourselves at home. More importantly, however, our simple urban living, sets the best example of all by using our bodies to carry out daily activities in a physical and more sustainable way. We are probably in a very small minority. Many homeschoolers, while rejecting conventional school, have their kids participate in sports as their physical education, never mind the vast majority of the population whose kids are in school with many participating in sports as well. That is is fine though. We aren't raising our kids to be like everyone else, but to make thoughtful choices about their activities and, therefore, views and priorities.
But keep checking in with us to see if the kids surprise us and ask to go on a team!
During our journey there, I couldn't help but think about the superior physical education that my kids are receiving. Getting to the store involved quite a bit of walking. First, we grabbed the bus down two blocks so we could hit the better mail box. (For some reason, the one at our block has one pick up while the one two blocks down has several pick ups at good times.) Then when we got off the bus we had to walk about five times as far as someone who would drive to the store and park in the lot. We also brought our grocery cart which had to be pushed, not just to and from a car, but to and from the bus. On the way home, knowing that getting the bus there has been unlucky for me without waiting a long time, we decided to walk and turn around each stop to see if it was coming (since the stops are pretty close together). By the time we saw it, we were less than a mile from home so we just kept walking for a total of about 2 miles. It was beautiful outside and and invigorating for the soul to be out in the sunshine with all the activity around.
A habit of regular exercise woven into life is what I prescribe as physical education. This will benefit them far into adulthood. It doesn't seem strange to them to walk distances to go places or to think about how to get things from one place to another without a car. Unfortunately, physical education traditionally focuses on sports, specifically team sports. I am all for sports that can be used regularly into adult life like running or swimming, but how many adults are on teams of the sports they used to play in school? Relatively few. Further, I have a serious problem with the message of team sports with the emphasis on competition. Even when competition is downplayed, there is always a winner and a loser. Many think competition is fundamental to our society particularly with the vast materialism in the name of the free market. However, I don't believe it has to be. It isn't inherent in our human nature. Real and widespread collaboration would be a better way. Of course, team sports reinforce competition in an enticing manner along side the conventional education and employment system. It isn't enough to talk about collaboration while continuing to subscribe to the institutions whose fundamental nature is competition. Our society would need to function quite a bit differently including rejecting conventional education with its testing, ranking, and sorting. It would have to be a revolution of sorts since competition is so woven into society. Almost every news broadcast where politics is discussed has it and walk into any business with a tv on and the vast majority have sports on for their customers (including the cafe at the grocery store this morning).
If T or C asked to join a sport would I let them? Of course. After all, we are trying to do our best at child centered learning. Will they ask? Probably not. We have limited the exposure to sports on tv and discussion of team or professional sports as much as we can. We wouldn't stop them from watching, but we never set an example of watching them ourselves at home. More importantly, however, our simple urban living, sets the best example of all by using our bodies to carry out daily activities in a physical and more sustainable way. We are probably in a very small minority. Many homeschoolers, while rejecting conventional school, have their kids participate in sports as their physical education, never mind the vast majority of the population whose kids are in school with many participating in sports as well. That is is fine though. We aren't raising our kids to be like everyone else, but to make thoughtful choices about their activities and, therefore, views and priorities.
But keep checking in with us to see if the kids surprise us and ask to go on a team!
Friday, September 14, 2012
The Freedom to Take on Something Bigger
My son's joining the training choir at St. Paul's Cathedral caused me to reflect on the great gift of flexibility that homeschooling provides. As kids progress in the choir program (an excellent free music education), the commitment can grow from one day a week to several. Several days a week on one activity is a significant commitment that I am not sure I could have done it when I was a child.
The transition from kindergarten to first grade was horrific for me. It wasn't the change in the work even though the academics got quite a bit more difficult between the two years, but the big change in schedule. Kindergarten was was only half-day. We had a focused three hours of school, reading groups and all. Then we went home to have lunch and free time. First grade was the first year of full day school. Despite being six and a half and having plenty of recess time, I remember crying every afternoon for two weeks at the beginning of the year. This also happened for one week at the beginning of second grade too. I don't remember the details as much as would be helpful, but I know that my mother explained that I had to go to school no matter what. After that, I am pretty sure I did my best to hide the crying as much as I could since I was the compliant type.
I know now from everything I have read on homeschooling why this happened. It isn't natural to expect kids under 7 or 8 to be away from their parents for such long periods of time, 7 or 8 hours if you include the bus ride. Now it is worse, of course, since kids go to full-day pre-k even younger and there is less recess time. Many kids are more resilient than I was and can handle it better than I did, but that shouldn't justify the thinking that such things are normal or healthy. I am not sure that it is right to blame my mother personally. Homeschooling was very remote during the 1980s. I am not sure that the option was even known to her. If she had known about it, the pressure of doing exactly what she and my grandfather had done may have overridden her decision anyway, nevermind the possible griping by extended family members. Certainly before the internet, resources weren't as readily available either. Of course I didn't hate school, just the full day part. Going half day, even year round probably would have been fine for me.
This difficult adjustment, however, limited the activities I got involved in. I remember trying to go to brownies in first grade and hating it. I think it was mainly that it extended the day too much after the long school day. My mother tried to come with me, but it just didn't work out. I also didn't like the arts and crafts focus. One of my issues with first grade was also that you couldn't just circle answers on worksheets, but had to spend the time coloring. The work was just drawn out. In my heart of hearts, I knew it wasn't necessary to be cooped up for such a long day and I knew it was the source of my misery.
For now, T's involvement in the training choir is only one day, but if it grows, he will have the free time and low stress to be able to tackle it. It won't be piled on an overscheduled week. This is good, because he has such an interest in singing. He walks down the streets of Buffalo singing all the time. He will really get a chance to do what he loves. I think that the overall social influence will be good too. The boys in the program, all of which are older than T, went out of their way to welcome him and I overheard them saying that they want to set a good example for the younger kids. I was impressed by this conscious effort from 8 and 9 year old boys. The best part was when he came out with a big smile on his face saying that he couldn't wait for next week.
His activities don't need to be limited to choir. Since academics take up only about an hour and half a day for T, he has plenty of time left for something else if he likes, maybe a sport or dance. This experience this week reinforces that homeschooling is such a good choice for opening up opportunities. Have you had a similar experience? Are your kids able to take on more because they aren't in school?
The transition from kindergarten to first grade was horrific for me. It wasn't the change in the work even though the academics got quite a bit more difficult between the two years, but the big change in schedule. Kindergarten was was only half-day. We had a focused three hours of school, reading groups and all. Then we went home to have lunch and free time. First grade was the first year of full day school. Despite being six and a half and having plenty of recess time, I remember crying every afternoon for two weeks at the beginning of the year. This also happened for one week at the beginning of second grade too. I don't remember the details as much as would be helpful, but I know that my mother explained that I had to go to school no matter what. After that, I am pretty sure I did my best to hide the crying as much as I could since I was the compliant type.
I know now from everything I have read on homeschooling why this happened. It isn't natural to expect kids under 7 or 8 to be away from their parents for such long periods of time, 7 or 8 hours if you include the bus ride. Now it is worse, of course, since kids go to full-day pre-k even younger and there is less recess time. Many kids are more resilient than I was and can handle it better than I did, but that shouldn't justify the thinking that such things are normal or healthy. I am not sure that it is right to blame my mother personally. Homeschooling was very remote during the 1980s. I am not sure that the option was even known to her. If she had known about it, the pressure of doing exactly what she and my grandfather had done may have overridden her decision anyway, nevermind the possible griping by extended family members. Certainly before the internet, resources weren't as readily available either. Of course I didn't hate school, just the full day part. Going half day, even year round probably would have been fine for me.
This difficult adjustment, however, limited the activities I got involved in. I remember trying to go to brownies in first grade and hating it. I think it was mainly that it extended the day too much after the long school day. My mother tried to come with me, but it just didn't work out. I also didn't like the arts and crafts focus. One of my issues with first grade was also that you couldn't just circle answers on worksheets, but had to spend the time coloring. The work was just drawn out. In my heart of hearts, I knew it wasn't necessary to be cooped up for such a long day and I knew it was the source of my misery.
For now, T's involvement in the training choir is only one day, but if it grows, he will have the free time and low stress to be able to tackle it. It won't be piled on an overscheduled week. This is good, because he has such an interest in singing. He walks down the streets of Buffalo singing all the time. He will really get a chance to do what he loves. I think that the overall social influence will be good too. The boys in the program, all of which are older than T, went out of their way to welcome him and I overheard them saying that they want to set a good example for the younger kids. I was impressed by this conscious effort from 8 and 9 year old boys. The best part was when he came out with a big smile on his face saying that he couldn't wait for next week.
His activities don't need to be limited to choir. Since academics take up only about an hour and half a day for T, he has plenty of time left for something else if he likes, maybe a sport or dance. This experience this week reinforces that homeschooling is such a good choice for opening up opportunities. Have you had a similar experience? Are your kids able to take on more because they aren't in school?
Friday, August 31, 2012
The First Day of School and Other Missed Milestones
Until my reunion, I checked facebook weekly at most. It just feels overwhelming. I am not entirely sure why, but I usually blame it on my fibro since my mother also finds it overwhelming. However, since I have been spending more time on it, I can't help but notice all the "First Day of School" pictures that people put up. Should I put up a picture of my kids with a caption "First Day of Not Going to School" or some other like post? It is very tempting, I can tell you.
Of course what kind of picture would capture the homeschooling spirit the most? A picture of C sleeping in with Dad after he did a late shift? The kids playing a board game with Dad in the middle of the day before he heads off to work? A picture from a day trip (more like half a day, I didn't feel up to a whole day) we took to nature trails earlier in the week? T reading? The kids working on their lessons on the computer? A picture from our play date yesterday? A picture of us getting on the NFTA bus? A picture of them with one of their dolls with a homemade paper dress? What about weighing bulk items to buy at the Lexington Co-op? Cooking? Caring for the worm farm? I suppose I will need to analyze this carefully since there are so many choices. How about this one - sending Dad off to work while we head out to the playground?
Am I a bad person to say that I find the whole "first day of school" and "back to school" somewhat cheesy, for lack of a better way to put it? It seems like such a manufactured milestone. Ending a school year presumably means accomplishing something, but at the beginning of the school year kids haven't done anything yet. If parents were really interested in learning wouldn't they be more excited about their kid learning to read (or swim or paint or sing) than turning a certain age by a certain deadline to be included in a school class? Is some of the frenzy that everyone does it and that you have to shop for it? After all, Americans love comparing themselves to other people and shopping is part of it. I guess this is it, I am just disturbed by the materialism and pressure to be like everyone else, rather than the pride of other parents.
Am I depriving my kids of the attention that comes with these sorts of milestones? T didn't have a kindergarten graduation, just a trip out for dessert just the four of us (it was last December, not even when graduations normally are). Certainly, the grandparents would have gotten excited about a graduation. I suppose that I could have bragged about it online or at the playground or at church. How would it have been received if I showed up at church in December and told my friends that T finished kindergarten? I am not sure it would have been the same. Regardless, I see it more as he completed the skills that are considered kindergarten in conventional school since my research has yielded the fact that the sequence is somewhat arbitrary. Also, the completion was just the core curriculum we use, but not the things that the kids come up with that are of interest. Can I really put a grade level on those things? The paper Barbie dress, the handmade paper skirt? The perfect freehand drawing of a princess? Baking? Making patterns with coins? Totaling up scores for board games using different methods? Learning to ride the NFTA bus? I think you get the point.
Am I doing my kids a favor by focusing more on the learning than the milestones? It feels like I am. Since I was so compliant about school and the whole work-hard-and-get-ahead, I always felt like I was living for the next school break, year completion, or graduation. There was too much pressure to savor the learning. I don't recall nurturing my outside interests all that well either. Research supports that focusing on the learning is better. If you read anything by Alfie Kohn, you will find this out too. Focusing on reward or punishment always takes away from the intrinsic value of the learning.
This homeschool year (if you want to call it that, since we don't take summers off) I want to do more unschooling. I am afraid to give up a structured curriculum completely, but we are going to do less of it. Time4Learning is already pretty efficient, but we are going to, where appropriate, test first and only do the areas that we don't know to free up time for whatever the kids want to do or read. We are going to read as many of the classic books as we can without overwhelming the kids. My health permitting, we are going to do more outings and field trips and play dates.
What about you? What are you going to do this "homeschool year"? What do you think about "back to school"? Am I the only one?
Of course what kind of picture would capture the homeschooling spirit the most? A picture of C sleeping in with Dad after he did a late shift? The kids playing a board game with Dad in the middle of the day before he heads off to work? A picture from a day trip (more like half a day, I didn't feel up to a whole day) we took to nature trails earlier in the week? T reading? The kids working on their lessons on the computer? A picture from our play date yesterday? A picture of us getting on the NFTA bus? A picture of them with one of their dolls with a homemade paper dress? What about weighing bulk items to buy at the Lexington Co-op? Cooking? Caring for the worm farm? I suppose I will need to analyze this carefully since there are so many choices. How about this one - sending Dad off to work while we head out to the playground?
Am I a bad person to say that I find the whole "first day of school" and "back to school" somewhat cheesy, for lack of a better way to put it? It seems like such a manufactured milestone. Ending a school year presumably means accomplishing something, but at the beginning of the school year kids haven't done anything yet. If parents were really interested in learning wouldn't they be more excited about their kid learning to read (or swim or paint or sing) than turning a certain age by a certain deadline to be included in a school class? Is some of the frenzy that everyone does it and that you have to shop for it? After all, Americans love comparing themselves to other people and shopping is part of it. I guess this is it, I am just disturbed by the materialism and pressure to be like everyone else, rather than the pride of other parents.
Am I depriving my kids of the attention that comes with these sorts of milestones? T didn't have a kindergarten graduation, just a trip out for dessert just the four of us (it was last December, not even when graduations normally are). Certainly, the grandparents would have gotten excited about a graduation. I suppose that I could have bragged about it online or at the playground or at church. How would it have been received if I showed up at church in December and told my friends that T finished kindergarten? I am not sure it would have been the same. Regardless, I see it more as he completed the skills that are considered kindergarten in conventional school since my research has yielded the fact that the sequence is somewhat arbitrary. Also, the completion was just the core curriculum we use, but not the things that the kids come up with that are of interest. Can I really put a grade level on those things? The paper Barbie dress, the handmade paper skirt? The perfect freehand drawing of a princess? Baking? Making patterns with coins? Totaling up scores for board games using different methods? Learning to ride the NFTA bus? I think you get the point.
Am I doing my kids a favor by focusing more on the learning than the milestones? It feels like I am. Since I was so compliant about school and the whole work-hard-and-get-ahead, I always felt like I was living for the next school break, year completion, or graduation. There was too much pressure to savor the learning. I don't recall nurturing my outside interests all that well either. Research supports that focusing on the learning is better. If you read anything by Alfie Kohn, you will find this out too. Focusing on reward or punishment always takes away from the intrinsic value of the learning.
This homeschool year (if you want to call it that, since we don't take summers off) I want to do more unschooling. I am afraid to give up a structured curriculum completely, but we are going to do less of it. Time4Learning is already pretty efficient, but we are going to, where appropriate, test first and only do the areas that we don't know to free up time for whatever the kids want to do or read. We are going to read as many of the classic books as we can without overwhelming the kids. My health permitting, we are going to do more outings and field trips and play dates.
What about you? What are you going to do this "homeschool year"? What do you think about "back to school"? Am I the only one?
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
Reunions and My Decision to Homeschool: A Reflection
We are coming upon the 20th reunion of my 8th grade class from St. Joan of Arc School in Chicopee, MA. Since we were a tight small group of under 30 students, it is a reunion I am going to make every effort to make. Until facebook, I fell out of touch with everyone, partly because I moved to Buffalo in 1997, but mainly because I was the only one from the group who went to my high school. Recently, I have been excitedly checking my facebook for info on the reunion. I go on almost daily, up from about weekly.
One of the funny things is that there was talk of who the class couple was. Despite seeming to be nominated, I don't have much of an opinion on it. However, I keep getting the funny feeling that if there is a "most changed" or something of that nature, I may be sure to win.
I wouldn't win at first glance, since other than being quite grey on top, I actually look quite a bit like I did twenty years ago. I don't have too many wrinkles and I am within 15 pounds of my graduation weight. Of course, in between I was 40 pounds heavier than now, but I had to lose weight to help my sleep to help my fibromyalgia. Of course, depending on the kind of fibro day I am having at the reunion, I may be hobbling or waddling around especially after the long car trip out there. We'll have to see about that. The best part for everyone though will be when I open my mouth and they hear the slight but distinctive western New York accent I acquired.
But what about the more substantive changes? Is anyone expecting a home schooling, bus riding, urban, Episcopalian, stay at home Mom with no car (I'll rent one to go there), no yard, no makeup and a home hair cut to boot. Heck, I have a worm farm composter in my kitchen and rarely go to grocery stores. I get my food from a CSA and a neighborhood food co-op.
I feel like there may be some surprised people whether they say it or not. When I was at St. Joan of Arc and high school - undergrad too - I was a really hard worker and good at school. I did every bit of homework, worked ahead, thought about school all the time, felt stressed about it, only read for pleasure during the summer, and had little other interests. I wouldn't say I was smart for two reasons. I had to work hard for my grades and I am pretty sure now that I only had (or only developed) the intelligences recognized in school. School wasn't the only institution I was all about. I was a Roman Catholic who never thought I would ever be anything else. My Catholic school teacher mother would never have let me miss church. I had visions of working super hard in Catholic high school and going to college with the best scholarship I could get. While I may not have expressed it at the time, I bought into the importance and order of the institutions in my life. I was going to get a good job, be thoroughly devoted to it, and live the same life as my parents. I'd live in a similar neighborhood and drive a similar car and have a similar house and go to a similar church even if in a different region of the country.
In some ways, I didn't disappoint. I graduated high in my high school class, got a full scholarship to college, got a good job, became a CPA, and went to graduate school part-time while I worked. I kept getting better and better jobs. My last job involved overseeing 3 departments at a large school district. These were pretty good accomplishments, if I may say so myself.
As I went along, I became tired, physically and mentally. Some if it was the fibromyalgia starting slowly and some of it was lack of satisfaction. Regardless, I gradually started to question the conventional life and institutions to which I had been devoted. I first realized that I wasn't living my faith, but punching the metaphorical church time clock. I became Episcopalian because it felt more like who I am. I got my traditional church service with women priests and openness to views on issues that I had. Next, I got tired of the mindless (despite NPR), waste of time, environmentally horrifying commute to my cozy condo in one of the two cars we had. As soon as I got it worked out we moved into the city in walking distance to my new job at the time. We immediately shed a car and actually started participating in things since we were closer to them again. Then Tom and I switched places. I stayed home with the kids to care for my health and he went back to work. I eventually found out I had fibromyalgia (shed the last car at the same time), something my mother didn't get until she was 50, 20 years later than I got it. Obviously, the genetics weren't in my favor, but without an traumatic triggering event, I can only surmise that it is the result of the pressure I put on myself to comply and be good at school and career.
This combination of realizing that whole schooling to career to consumption lifestyle was unfulfilling and realizing that all that hard working couldn't safeguard against (and maybe even caused) the onset of a lifelong chronic illness led me to researching homeschooling for my own kids. I also saw that despite being sold on school and college, that my husband with a masters degree was in and out of low wage collections jobs all the time. Fortunately, now he is a security guard which is more stable (and he loves it), but is still not in line with what we were told growing up about getting a good education. With all this, I wanted my kids to have a childhood rather than be cooped up 7 hours a day plus several hours of homework. I want them to explore all their intelligence types. I wanted them to have interests other than traditional academics. At home, academics can be handled in a fraction of the time and at one's own pace leaving time for bigger multifaceted project experiences. Certainly I put pressure on myself when I was young, but conventional school encourages and rewards this kind of compliance. It is also a mission with enough flexibility for me now that it looks like I won't be returning to the career I had.
So what am I saying about St. Joan of Arc if I am homeschooling my own kids? Nothing against it. If someone is going to sent their child to conventional school, I know of no better place. I enjoyed great classmates and the best teachers you can find. Without the great people, I wouldn't be the person I am today. I received an education from caring people with great values. I just reject the full time job school is for kids, especially now 20 years later (no more half day kindergarten and pre-k a year earlier). Homeschooling just feels like the right thing to do. The funny thing is that my kids are healthier than I was as a kid, happier, and further ahead than I was academically to boot. The other funny thing is that I don't spend any more time on hard core academics than my friends do just getting their kids ready for school and helping with homework.
If you are a homeschool parent, are people from your past surprised? Are you even a little surprised at yourself?
One of the funny things is that there was talk of who the class couple was. Despite seeming to be nominated, I don't have much of an opinion on it. However, I keep getting the funny feeling that if there is a "most changed" or something of that nature, I may be sure to win.
I wouldn't win at first glance, since other than being quite grey on top, I actually look quite a bit like I did twenty years ago. I don't have too many wrinkles and I am within 15 pounds of my graduation weight. Of course, in between I was 40 pounds heavier than now, but I had to lose weight to help my sleep to help my fibromyalgia. Of course, depending on the kind of fibro day I am having at the reunion, I may be hobbling or waddling around especially after the long car trip out there. We'll have to see about that. The best part for everyone though will be when I open my mouth and they hear the slight but distinctive western New York accent I acquired.
But what about the more substantive changes? Is anyone expecting a home schooling, bus riding, urban, Episcopalian, stay at home Mom with no car (I'll rent one to go there), no yard, no makeup and a home hair cut to boot. Heck, I have a worm farm composter in my kitchen and rarely go to grocery stores. I get my food from a CSA and a neighborhood food co-op.
I feel like there may be some surprised people whether they say it or not. When I was at St. Joan of Arc and high school - undergrad too - I was a really hard worker and good at school. I did every bit of homework, worked ahead, thought about school all the time, felt stressed about it, only read for pleasure during the summer, and had little other interests. I wouldn't say I was smart for two reasons. I had to work hard for my grades and I am pretty sure now that I only had (or only developed) the intelligences recognized in school. School wasn't the only institution I was all about. I was a Roman Catholic who never thought I would ever be anything else. My Catholic school teacher mother would never have let me miss church. I had visions of working super hard in Catholic high school and going to college with the best scholarship I could get. While I may not have expressed it at the time, I bought into the importance and order of the institutions in my life. I was going to get a good job, be thoroughly devoted to it, and live the same life as my parents. I'd live in a similar neighborhood and drive a similar car and have a similar house and go to a similar church even if in a different region of the country.
In some ways, I didn't disappoint. I graduated high in my high school class, got a full scholarship to college, got a good job, became a CPA, and went to graduate school part-time while I worked. I kept getting better and better jobs. My last job involved overseeing 3 departments at a large school district. These were pretty good accomplishments, if I may say so myself.
As I went along, I became tired, physically and mentally. Some if it was the fibromyalgia starting slowly and some of it was lack of satisfaction. Regardless, I gradually started to question the conventional life and institutions to which I had been devoted. I first realized that I wasn't living my faith, but punching the metaphorical church time clock. I became Episcopalian because it felt more like who I am. I got my traditional church service with women priests and openness to views on issues that I had. Next, I got tired of the mindless (despite NPR), waste of time, environmentally horrifying commute to my cozy condo in one of the two cars we had. As soon as I got it worked out we moved into the city in walking distance to my new job at the time. We immediately shed a car and actually started participating in things since we were closer to them again. Then Tom and I switched places. I stayed home with the kids to care for my health and he went back to work. I eventually found out I had fibromyalgia (shed the last car at the same time), something my mother didn't get until she was 50, 20 years later than I got it. Obviously, the genetics weren't in my favor, but without an traumatic triggering event, I can only surmise that it is the result of the pressure I put on myself to comply and be good at school and career.
This combination of realizing that whole schooling to career to consumption lifestyle was unfulfilling and realizing that all that hard working couldn't safeguard against (and maybe even caused) the onset of a lifelong chronic illness led me to researching homeschooling for my own kids. I also saw that despite being sold on school and college, that my husband with a masters degree was in and out of low wage collections jobs all the time. Fortunately, now he is a security guard which is more stable (and he loves it), but is still not in line with what we were told growing up about getting a good education. With all this, I wanted my kids to have a childhood rather than be cooped up 7 hours a day plus several hours of homework. I want them to explore all their intelligence types. I wanted them to have interests other than traditional academics. At home, academics can be handled in a fraction of the time and at one's own pace leaving time for bigger multifaceted project experiences. Certainly I put pressure on myself when I was young, but conventional school encourages and rewards this kind of compliance. It is also a mission with enough flexibility for me now that it looks like I won't be returning to the career I had.
So what am I saying about St. Joan of Arc if I am homeschooling my own kids? Nothing against it. If someone is going to sent their child to conventional school, I know of no better place. I enjoyed great classmates and the best teachers you can find. Without the great people, I wouldn't be the person I am today. I received an education from caring people with great values. I just reject the full time job school is for kids, especially now 20 years later (no more half day kindergarten and pre-k a year earlier). Homeschooling just feels like the right thing to do. The funny thing is that my kids are healthier than I was as a kid, happier, and further ahead than I was academically to boot. The other funny thing is that I don't spend any more time on hard core academics than my friends do just getting their kids ready for school and helping with homework.
If you are a homeschool parent, are people from your past surprised? Are you even a little surprised at yourself?
Thursday, August 9, 2012
There Are No Breaks in Homeschool!
Thanks to the grandparents I got to take the kids on vacation to Maine. Dad had to stay home, luckily to start a new job, not continue to look for one. So, did we get a break from homeschool? Not at all! Yes, I let the kids skip their Time4Learning for the week, but they didn't stop learning. Besides, what better place to learn than at the beach! It was unstructured learning though. I brought along several books from the library on the ocean, Maine, rocks, and seashells. We looked things up as needed, but made no effort to read anything cover to cover. The first day, it was raining, but the tide was out at a good time, so we went for a walk and collected rocks and seashells. Over the next several days we tried to look them up to see what we found. For the rocks we tried to make an educated guess at igneous, metamorphic, or sedimentary based on what we read.
I showed the kids that if you dig, you can reach water. We even made a little canal and a sort of tide pool. It wasn't exactly the Erie canal, but I think they got the idea.
They also had a great time playing in the ocean. C rode some waves with Grandpa and T goofed off in the water. They wore their long suits and hats to stay out of the UV rays.
I showed the kids that if you dig, you can reach water. We even made a little canal and a sort of tide pool. It wasn't exactly the Erie canal, but I think they got the idea.
They also had a great time playing in the ocean. C rode some waves with Grandpa and T goofed off in the water. They wore their long suits and hats to stay out of the UV rays.
Grandpa took T and C candlepin bowling for the first time. He got them bumpers of course, but, hopefully, it will get them interested in the sport. Too bad there is only regular bowling in Buffalo.
Don't forget about crafts too. Mem helped them teach them how to do a type of knitting. It was fun to watch them since I did that as a kid.
It was a great time. There was a lot of learning too. While many homeschool families say that they take the summer off, I doubt they stop learning. I think when homeschool families say they take a break, they are really taking a break from formal curriculum. Reading and exploration continues anyway. This was certainly the case for us.
What about you? Do you take a "break" from homeschool? What does taking a break mean to you?
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
Old Fashioned Travel for an Old Fashioned Education
If you have been reading my companion blog, you know that on July 6, 2012 we took an unusual trip with the help of the grandparents. Driving from Buffalo to Chicopee, MA is nothing new for our family, especially me. I have been making the trip regularly since 1997 when I moved to Buffalo. We've always taken the NYS Thruway with the most choice being where to stop, like the supply of fast food was a big variety, and whether to stay on the thruway or stay on Interstate 90 when with goes around Albany. With the kids the trip takes around 7 hours, pretty efficient like most modern travel. Modern travel with its well placed conveniences and efficiency is centered very much around getting where you are going, and not about the trip. Interstate highways have taken motorists off of the traditional US highways where people actually work and live. Worse is the way people fly around place to place without even having to think about the people they pass by or the real distance they are going.
For a long time, I thought about how interesting it would be to travel on the old US highways across the country, like US 20, or up a coast, like US 1. It reminds me of old movies from the 1930s and 1940s before the interstate system. It was a time where, if you drove somewhere, you couldn't help but go slower and experience the places you passed through. I can't see a situation where we will be able to do the whole thing at once, but I thought we may get to do it in increments. We started on July 6, 2012 by attempting to pick up US 20 as soon as we could outside of Buffalo and take it to Springfield, MA. Because we ran out of time we picked up the NYS Thruway just outside of Albany. While we decided to go at the last minute and I didn't have time to review Carschooling
, the kids brought maps and followed some of the town names.
The trip was a great time even though it wasn't exactly the way I expected. First of all, I thought the kids would be into seeing all the farms as we passed, but after the first few, the fascination wore off a bit. Despite being city kids, I suppose seeing cows from the car is only so interesting. We did, however, get to stop at lakes, farms, and dairy stands that we hadn't seen before despite frequently driving within a few miles of them. Here are the highlights:
This kind of travel is like homeschool, where being able to take your time and ignore the conventional ways gives your a more full experience. I don't remember how many times I have driven from Buffalo to Chicopee, but we won't forget this trip with all the sights and fun stops on the way.
For a long time, I thought about how interesting it would be to travel on the old US highways across the country, like US 20, or up a coast, like US 1. It reminds me of old movies from the 1930s and 1940s before the interstate system. It was a time where, if you drove somewhere, you couldn't help but go slower and experience the places you passed through. I can't see a situation where we will be able to do the whole thing at once, but I thought we may get to do it in increments. We started on July 6, 2012 by attempting to pick up US 20 as soon as we could outside of Buffalo and take it to Springfield, MA. Because we ran out of time we picked up the NYS Thruway just outside of Albany. While we decided to go at the last minute and I didn't have time to review Carschooling
, the kids brought maps and followed some of the town names.
The trip was a great time even though it wasn't exactly the way I expected. First of all, I thought the kids would be into seeing all the farms as we passed, but after the first few, the fascination wore off a bit. Despite being city kids, I suppose seeing cows from the car is only so interesting. We did, however, get to stop at lakes, farms, and dairy stands that we hadn't seen before despite frequently driving within a few miles of them. Here are the highlights:
This kind of travel is like homeschool, where being able to take your time and ignore the conventional ways gives your a more full experience. I don't remember how many times I have driven from Buffalo to Chicopee, but we won't forget this trip with all the sights and fun stops on the way.
Sunday, July 1, 2012
Homeschooling: The Occasional Problem with Self-Paced Learning
This week I couldn't help but think about how nice it is to stop and smell the flowers. C loves to stop and look at flowers and butterflies and rocks and ants and, well, everything. It's great to have the freedom to explore what is around us, an amazing amount of nature for our city environment. I don't remember doing this as much when I was a child. I probably did when I was four and half, and just don't remember. However, by the time I was in school full days at six and a half, there just wasn't the time. We had homework, places to be, and strict bedtimes. We played in the neighborhood after school with the other kids, but by that time of day, our brains were fried and the energy for natural learning was lower. It seems we destroyed ant hills more than we watched them.
I am getting better at letting their interests dictate our activities, but I am far from perfect. When it comes to letting them learn at their own pace with the curriculum we use, however, I always felt like we were on the right track. First of all, we only spend about an hour a day on it or less. Second, they can repeat any sections or activities that they have trouble with. Third, they can work ahead whenever they want. Finally, my kids happen to be ahead of their peers at this point. This could always change of course, but it does give me some added comfort right now.
Unfortunately, C is too far ahead in math. She finished kindergarten, but isn't ready for first grade math at all. There is a big jump between two levels, at least in math. You would think that this wouldn't be too much of a problem because we could either take a break or she could repeat some of the kindergarten activities. However, since I have always let them go ahead when they finish something, she wants to proceed. We have done the first lesson multiple times, and I added some customized activities with Mom in between. Over time, the pace will moderate with adding these hands-on activities and slowing down by repeating, but will she get frustrated in the meantime? Will I get frustrated at designing extra activities that we might not have needed if she tried it older? Only time will tell.
Has this happened to you? How did you handle it? How did it turn out?
I am getting better at letting their interests dictate our activities, but I am far from perfect. When it comes to letting them learn at their own pace with the curriculum we use, however, I always felt like we were on the right track. First of all, we only spend about an hour a day on it or less. Second, they can repeat any sections or activities that they have trouble with. Third, they can work ahead whenever they want. Finally, my kids happen to be ahead of their peers at this point. This could always change of course, but it does give me some added comfort right now.
Unfortunately, C is too far ahead in math. She finished kindergarten, but isn't ready for first grade math at all. There is a big jump between two levels, at least in math. You would think that this wouldn't be too much of a problem because we could either take a break or she could repeat some of the kindergarten activities. However, since I have always let them go ahead when they finish something, she wants to proceed. We have done the first lesson multiple times, and I added some customized activities with Mom in between. Over time, the pace will moderate with adding these hands-on activities and slowing down by repeating, but will she get frustrated in the meantime? Will I get frustrated at designing extra activities that we might not have needed if she tried it older? Only time will tell.
Has this happened to you? How did you handle it? How did it turn out?
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
Urban Homeschooling: More Traditional Socialization and Weathering Tough Times
WARNING: this may be considered radical thinking by some! I wrote a couple of months ago thinking I would rework it and post it at some point. Since Dad is out of work again, it seems like a good time to post.
This past Easter, since it was just the four of us, I decided to make spaghetti. At first I guilted myself for not putting the effort into a ham or other traditional meal. For my parents and grandparents, spaghetti is not what you eat on Easter. I remembered many years of Easters with ham or some other meat-potato-vegetable type food. Then I thought about my great-grandparents. Half of mine and half of my husband’s likely ate spaghetti on at least some Easters. At that point, I stopped feeling guilty. By being less traditional we were being more traditional.
For several weeks after that, I contemplated that same concept with our home schooling and urban lifestyle. Our grandparents pioneered suburban living as they became adults and our parents perfected it. As generation X kids we had nice childhoods of school and church activities, playing in the yard and, of course, riding everywhere in the comfort of a car. Certainly we had friends and it was a nice childhood, but I don’t remember being particularly connected to neighbors, or the familiar faces at the library, the bank, or the grocery store. We didn’t even have that much time to enjoy the yard (except for summer) because of the focus on being outside the home at school and work. School friends eventually became acquaintances or ended up living far away.
What was tradition for us, was a dramatic departure from the life most of my great-grandparents lived. They lived in small cities either in two family homes with relatives or with their place of business. While they didn’t home school, they were in walking distance from the school and my grandparents had the time to come home for lunch if they wanted. Church and local businesses with people they knew were close by. My great-aunt talks about going down to the local small grocery to get items and my great-grandfather would settle the account weekly on pay day. If they weren’t friends with everyone in the neighborhood, they certainly knew everyone by face at the very least. It wasn’t an easy life, of course. It was a tremendous amount of work and there were hardships in the forms of illness and increased mortality, but the avoidable stresses created by modern life didn’t exist. My great-grandmothers did the large amount of work it took to run a house with fewer conveniences, but never worried about day care, if the amount of homework was too great, if they followed the right parenting advice or if their commutes were too long. If they wanted to pop out to the store, they yelled up the stairs to ask auntie to keep an eye on the kids. My great-grandfathers worked close by, not wasting time on long commutes and sometimes even making it home for lunch. They didn’t have much, but they also didn’t take on a lot of debt or manufactured stress either. There was a simplicity and a connectedness.
Expectations for their kids were different too. Certainly they were expected to be good citizens and work hard as they grew up, but they weren’t necessary expected to achieve the resource intensive independence of moving away from the family that later became the norm. It was OK to stay in the home if there was room or move to the other apartment in the same house. This is very different from the way we grew up. My parents had specific ideas in mind about my leaving home. My husband made a hasty decision on a part-time graduate school program (while working) to avoid being required to leave home before he could afford it. Thank goodness he didn’t go into debt for the degree that turned out to not be much help in the job market.
It is about 80 years after my great-grandparents were our age now and we are moving back toward their lifestyles and away from the ones of our childhood. For reasons that are a combination of conscious choice, health issues, and economic issues, we live in a thriving urban neighborhood so we can ride the bus, and walk to stores, the bank, playgrounds, and the library. We live in a two family home with no back yard, no cable, home hair cuts, and mostly home cooked meals. While we don’t necessarily have the whole neighborhood over for a visit, we know a significant number of people in the neighborhood by name or face. My kids regularly see and talk to the same kids at the playground, tellers at the bank, librarians at our local branch, and cashiers at the local food co-op. When I popped into the bank early one morning without the kids, the tellers all asked where the kids were (Dad was home that morning) and were relieved to hear that I was getting a new tenant rather than being paid the rent in installments often times. Some of the cashiers at our co-op ask about our home school activities that day and how I am feeling and if switching to organic has helped with my fibro. The librarians are always talking to the kids about their homeschool days and telling them about upcoming library activities. We even say a polite hello to the street guy who sells hand-made jewelry. It isn’t exactly the lifestyle of my great-grandparents, but it is as close as is feasible given modern life.
While not as bold as moving across an ocean for a new life, we are demanding a new life for our kids as urban homeschoolers. We have decided on a lifestyle of learning, conservation, and socialization in our urban environment rather than the stresses of conventional schooling. Like our Easter, we are living a more traditional life by being less traditional. Our kids learn from reading, games, and hands-on activities as well as being out in the world in our city neighborhood (with a small amount of structured curriculum). We also take the bus to the museums and attractions Buffalo has to offer, a pretty large number given the size of our city.
Our expectations for their futures are different too. College and resource intensive independence at any cost are not what we have in mind. Certainly, debt will be out of the question since one never knows what will happen with one’s health or place in the job market. We wouldn’t be surviving with our current problems if we had student loans. Obviously, we expect some sort of productivity and societal contribution from our kids which will hopefully be natural with the community values we are instilling. However, there are more options than high stress careers. There are many types of work, businesses to start, staying at home with kids, and volunteering. We fully accept the possibility of their remaining home or moving to the upstairs apartment and sharing the lower expenses of a house that will be paid off by then. With lower expenses, they probably have a better chance of going to college if they choose because they will more likely be able to pay for it as they go even if part-time. They will have a better chance to stay home or have their spouse stay home with kids since there won’t be the pressure of high expenses. Rather than the traditional milestones in life, there will be life-long learning and thoughtful family centered choices. Of course, if they want to pursue what is now the traditional resource intensive life, they are free to, but at least not expected to.
Of course, if it is the latter they choose, we won’t be much help. It just won’t be possible for us. While our parents generously made sure we had at least an undergraduate education (we paid our own graduate school as we worked and went part-time), all we will be able to provide our kids are more choices in the way of less stress, less pressure, and perhaps more of a chance to find their true selves. I think many generation Xers and Yers are feeling a pull this direction for many similar reasons. The best thing to do is to embrace these more sustainable and family-centered ways to benefit their family’s health and life.
Speaking of health - what is more of a physical education: team sport skills or establishing a true active lifestyle of moving by walking and working? Given the less modern healthcare 80 years ago, my great-grandparents lived relatively long lives because of the healthier food and more active life including less reliance on the door to door transportation of a car. My kids seem much healthier for this type of lifestyle than many supposedly sports involved kids I see. Just another aspect of urban home schooling to think about!
We believe that life can be more family-centered and less stressful which is becoming more important in light of economic and educational trends today. I hope you continue to check in with us!
This past Easter, since it was just the four of us, I decided to make spaghetti. At first I guilted myself for not putting the effort into a ham or other traditional meal. For my parents and grandparents, spaghetti is not what you eat on Easter. I remembered many years of Easters with ham or some other meat-potato-vegetable type food. Then I thought about my great-grandparents. Half of mine and half of my husband’s likely ate spaghetti on at least some Easters. At that point, I stopped feeling guilty. By being less traditional we were being more traditional.
For several weeks after that, I contemplated that same concept with our home schooling and urban lifestyle. Our grandparents pioneered suburban living as they became adults and our parents perfected it. As generation X kids we had nice childhoods of school and church activities, playing in the yard and, of course, riding everywhere in the comfort of a car. Certainly we had friends and it was a nice childhood, but I don’t remember being particularly connected to neighbors, or the familiar faces at the library, the bank, or the grocery store. We didn’t even have that much time to enjoy the yard (except for summer) because of the focus on being outside the home at school and work. School friends eventually became acquaintances or ended up living far away.
What was tradition for us, was a dramatic departure from the life most of my great-grandparents lived. They lived in small cities either in two family homes with relatives or with their place of business. While they didn’t home school, they were in walking distance from the school and my grandparents had the time to come home for lunch if they wanted. Church and local businesses with people they knew were close by. My great-aunt talks about going down to the local small grocery to get items and my great-grandfather would settle the account weekly on pay day. If they weren’t friends with everyone in the neighborhood, they certainly knew everyone by face at the very least. It wasn’t an easy life, of course. It was a tremendous amount of work and there were hardships in the forms of illness and increased mortality, but the avoidable stresses created by modern life didn’t exist. My great-grandmothers did the large amount of work it took to run a house with fewer conveniences, but never worried about day care, if the amount of homework was too great, if they followed the right parenting advice or if their commutes were too long. If they wanted to pop out to the store, they yelled up the stairs to ask auntie to keep an eye on the kids. My great-grandfathers worked close by, not wasting time on long commutes and sometimes even making it home for lunch. They didn’t have much, but they also didn’t take on a lot of debt or manufactured stress either. There was a simplicity and a connectedness.
Expectations for their kids were different too. Certainly they were expected to be good citizens and work hard as they grew up, but they weren’t necessary expected to achieve the resource intensive independence of moving away from the family that later became the norm. It was OK to stay in the home if there was room or move to the other apartment in the same house. This is very different from the way we grew up. My parents had specific ideas in mind about my leaving home. My husband made a hasty decision on a part-time graduate school program (while working) to avoid being required to leave home before he could afford it. Thank goodness he didn’t go into debt for the degree that turned out to not be much help in the job market.
It is about 80 years after my great-grandparents were our age now and we are moving back toward their lifestyles and away from the ones of our childhood. For reasons that are a combination of conscious choice, health issues, and economic issues, we live in a thriving urban neighborhood so we can ride the bus, and walk to stores, the bank, playgrounds, and the library. We live in a two family home with no back yard, no cable, home hair cuts, and mostly home cooked meals. While we don’t necessarily have the whole neighborhood over for a visit, we know a significant number of people in the neighborhood by name or face. My kids regularly see and talk to the same kids at the playground, tellers at the bank, librarians at our local branch, and cashiers at the local food co-op. When I popped into the bank early one morning without the kids, the tellers all asked where the kids were (Dad was home that morning) and were relieved to hear that I was getting a new tenant rather than being paid the rent in installments often times. Some of the cashiers at our co-op ask about our home school activities that day and how I am feeling and if switching to organic has helped with my fibro. The librarians are always talking to the kids about their homeschool days and telling them about upcoming library activities. We even say a polite hello to the street guy who sells hand-made jewelry. It isn’t exactly the lifestyle of my great-grandparents, but it is as close as is feasible given modern life.
While not as bold as moving across an ocean for a new life, we are demanding a new life for our kids as urban homeschoolers. We have decided on a lifestyle of learning, conservation, and socialization in our urban environment rather than the stresses of conventional schooling. Like our Easter, we are living a more traditional life by being less traditional. Our kids learn from reading, games, and hands-on activities as well as being out in the world in our city neighborhood (with a small amount of structured curriculum). We also take the bus to the museums and attractions Buffalo has to offer, a pretty large number given the size of our city.
Our expectations for their futures are different too. College and resource intensive independence at any cost are not what we have in mind. Certainly, debt will be out of the question since one never knows what will happen with one’s health or place in the job market. We wouldn’t be surviving with our current problems if we had student loans. Obviously, we expect some sort of productivity and societal contribution from our kids which will hopefully be natural with the community values we are instilling. However, there are more options than high stress careers. There are many types of work, businesses to start, staying at home with kids, and volunteering. We fully accept the possibility of their remaining home or moving to the upstairs apartment and sharing the lower expenses of a house that will be paid off by then. With lower expenses, they probably have a better chance of going to college if they choose because they will more likely be able to pay for it as they go even if part-time. They will have a better chance to stay home or have their spouse stay home with kids since there won’t be the pressure of high expenses. Rather than the traditional milestones in life, there will be life-long learning and thoughtful family centered choices. Of course, if they want to pursue what is now the traditional resource intensive life, they are free to, but at least not expected to.
Of course, if it is the latter they choose, we won’t be much help. It just won’t be possible for us. While our parents generously made sure we had at least an undergraduate education (we paid our own graduate school as we worked and went part-time), all we will be able to provide our kids are more choices in the way of less stress, less pressure, and perhaps more of a chance to find their true selves. I think many generation Xers and Yers are feeling a pull this direction for many similar reasons. The best thing to do is to embrace these more sustainable and family-centered ways to benefit their family’s health and life.
Speaking of health - what is more of a physical education: team sport skills or establishing a true active lifestyle of moving by walking and working? Given the less modern healthcare 80 years ago, my great-grandparents lived relatively long lives because of the healthier food and more active life including less reliance on the door to door transportation of a car. My kids seem much healthier for this type of lifestyle than many supposedly sports involved kids I see. Just another aspect of urban home schooling to think about!
We believe that life can be more family-centered and less stressful which is becoming more important in light of economic and educational trends today. I hope you continue to check in with us!
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
Fun Math for Different Learning Styles
We unschool most of the time spending only about an hour or so a day on an online curriculum. Of course, I have been looking for ways to work on math through everyday life and games. For T who has more of an interest in the calm of traditional learning, it is just about keeping it fun. He loves to play Yahtzee. It is a fun way to work on skills as a family or have Dad take over homeschool after work.
C likes it too, but for her I try to make math more active. Even though she is only 4 we read the 2 digit measurement numbers on the side of the pool and measure items for baking.
Another fun activity for city dwellers is math in the neighborhood. When T was learning ones, tens, and hundreds place I had them stomping on the address numbers in the sidewalk:
We also measure food at the Lexington Co-op since they have produce and bulk food bins. It is hard to get a picture of it though because at their ages it still takes lots of supervision especially when it is busy! Regardless, the goal is to keep math fun and applicable to their lives.
C likes it too, but for her I try to make math more active. Even though she is only 4 we read the 2 digit measurement numbers on the side of the pool and measure items for baking.
Another fun activity for city dwellers is math in the neighborhood. When T was learning ones, tens, and hundreds place I had them stomping on the address numbers in the sidewalk:
We also measure food at the Lexington Co-op since they have produce and bulk food bins. It is hard to get a picture of it though because at their ages it still takes lots of supervision especially when it is busy! Regardless, the goal is to keep math fun and applicable to their lives.
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Homeschooling Failures
The past couple of weeks have been full of hands-on, active learning, a big preference of C. We have been picking and taking pictures of wildflowers in the neighborhood, gathering rocks, measuring rain, and looking at the effects of UV.
Generally, I suppose it has been successful. The kids seemed to learn and enjoy our activities, but there were also a couple of failures. The failures have mainly been mine for poorly understanding an activity we attempted. One was trying to gather earthworms to compost in the house. The three worms we found didn't last and very soon we realized we needed more research. We found out, of course, that you need special red wigglers and you need to be careful about buying or constructing a worm bin. We are likely going to proceed with getting the right worms since it is a way to compost indoors in the city, but we felt silly for putting time (no money - thank goodness) into something without research. The other failure, while not much wasted time, made me feel really stupid. We tried to make a rainbow using the sun, a mirror and water, but failed miserably. It seemed to be such a basic activity, but we couldn't figure out what we did wrong. Fortunately we saw a rainbow in the sky a few days later near our house, no need to take the bus to Niagara Falls!
As the teacher of my children, I have spent the past several days back and forth on the implications of some of these failures of activities. To an extent, I feel that "all's well that ends well" - nothing really bad or really great - end of story - move on. In other ways, I am very worried that I am setting a poor example for my kids regarding preparedness by not testing the activities before introducing them or not doing enough research before jumping into something. Still in other ways, I think I may be setting the exactly the right example by showing that science and life is trial and error and that you continue the exploration and pursuit of truth no matter what happens. I would like to comfort myself that this this precisely the point of homeschooling, but I am not sure when I will stop wrestling with this. They are 5 and 4 now, won't this dilemma get worse as they get older? What do you think, success, failure, or no big deal? Have you had experiences like this?
Generally, I suppose it has been successful. The kids seemed to learn and enjoy our activities, but there were also a couple of failures. The failures have mainly been mine for poorly understanding an activity we attempted. One was trying to gather earthworms to compost in the house. The three worms we found didn't last and very soon we realized we needed more research. We found out, of course, that you need special red wigglers and you need to be careful about buying or constructing a worm bin. We are likely going to proceed with getting the right worms since it is a way to compost indoors in the city, but we felt silly for putting time (no money - thank goodness) into something without research. The other failure, while not much wasted time, made me feel really stupid. We tried to make a rainbow using the sun, a mirror and water, but failed miserably. It seemed to be such a basic activity, but we couldn't figure out what we did wrong. Fortunately we saw a rainbow in the sky a few days later near our house, no need to take the bus to Niagara Falls!
As the teacher of my children, I have spent the past several days back and forth on the implications of some of these failures of activities. To an extent, I feel that "all's well that ends well" - nothing really bad or really great - end of story - move on. In other ways, I am very worried that I am setting a poor example for my kids regarding preparedness by not testing the activities before introducing them or not doing enough research before jumping into something. Still in other ways, I think I may be setting the exactly the right example by showing that science and life is trial and error and that you continue the exploration and pursuit of truth no matter what happens. I would like to comfort myself that this this precisely the point of homeschooling, but I am not sure when I will stop wrestling with this. They are 5 and 4 now, won't this dilemma get worse as they get older? What do you think, success, failure, or no big deal? Have you had experiences like this?
Monday, April 30, 2012
Endless Joy for Mom - Continued
Unfortunately, I am afraid to bring my camera near the pool, but we have had a banner set of homeschool days over the past week. Both C (on Friday) and T (on Monday) have passed their swimming lessons from Mom. T isn't even 5.5 yet and C isn't 4.5 yet and they can both swim 25 yards doing a combination of doggie paddle and rolling onto their back and floating and kicking. I feel that they are safe enough in the pool. There is plenty of time for stroke refinement. C is a real natural at swimming so it may not be far behind anyway. I was so thrilled. Start to finish our lessons took less than 6 weeks (we have been averaging 3 times per week of swimming). I would love to take credit, but their comfort in the water made it easy. Still, it makes me feel so good as a Mom!
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